Time for friends

On Friday night my partner Dave went for a meal and drinks with his friends. This is something they try to do every month or so, often meeting for drinks during the month, or going to play sport together, or just popping to each others houses for a drink. I'm really pleased that he is able to do this and see his friends on a regular basis, he works long hours and then comes home to a toddler and a pregnant partner, everybody needs a break sometimes!

 

This got me to thinking about how lucky he is to have such a close group of friends. They have been friends for many years, some since primary school. They manage to meet up fairly regularly and the only things that their arrangements have to fit around are work, other social commitments and the odd childcare duty for some.

 

All of this thinking had me reminiscing on days gone by when I used to meet my friends for lunch. LUNCH. I lunched with friends! The drunken nights out with girlfriends that feel like they were in a different lifetime. Or just nipping to the pub after work for a quick drink before going home. And then it hit me ... I really have given up my social life to have and raise this family. But not only have I given up my social life, my friends have had to give up theirs too. I would never complain about it because this is the life I chose, I wanted this for as long as I can remember and I wouldn't change it. 

 

My best friend moved about an hour away just before we had our children, so although we are lucky enough to be able to talk to each other every day, its not quite the same as seeing each other regularly. Most of my friends have children now and when we meet up it tends to be somewhere that the children can play safely whilst we try our best to catch up between keeping them fed, wiping away tears and rushing home for nap time. Evenings, or even days, without the children can be difficult to arrange when all of you are working around your other half's work and social commitments.

 

I've found that since having Oliver, I've grown apart from some of my friends because there is just never a chance to catch up. I've also grown closer to some of my friends because having children has given us something else to bond over. And of course I've made some lovely new friends since having Oliver that I never would of made if it weren't for him.

 

So I thought instead of mourning for the social life I once had, I need to cherish the one I have now, it's not forever. I'm sure that one day, when I have all of my time back to myself, I'll look back and long for this 'social life' I have now.  That being said, I've also realised that every few months I need to insist that my friends and I leave our children with their dads whilst we go and have some fun!

 

Thanks for stopping by folks, I hope this inspires you to get in touch with whoever it may be to organise that long overdue night out!

 

Nisha x